65lbs lost…then life happened

I was relieved when I was given the great news that the signs of pseudotumor cerebri  (or benign intracranial hypertension) had disappeared. My headaches had improved and I had been doing great maintaining my 65lbs weight loss but then life happened. My husband and I desired another child and within months our wishes had come true. With that came the nausea and fatigue, out the door went my healthy eating and on came the pounds. Quickly! The sicker I felt, the more junk I would eat. Yes, I did try to eat some healthy items for the baby but I also ate lots of my favorite fat and sugar-ridden obsessions.  At around 10 weeks I got a huge surprise, TWINS! I was shocked, elated and incredibly “hungry sick”.  That’s my combination of an uneasy stomach with an undying desire for carbohydrate dense foods. It’s no wonder I gained lots of weight. How much? I honestly can’t tell you because I just became oblivious to the scale.  A few months after the twins were born, I started to monitor my eating again and I made my way back down to 260lbs. Being an even busier mom of four now, I became content with the idea that I was within 10lbs of my previous weight loss even though I was incredibly insecure about how I looked.  It wasn’t until the twins were just over 18 months that I decided to attempt more weight loss. At this point I hated the idea of logging my food but found a new passion for fitness with the Salsaerobics and Zumba classes. It wasn’t easy the first time I walked in, I wanted to hide in the corner where hopefully no one would notice me and all that jiggled when I moved. Before I knew it, none of that seemed to matter and I was hooked! Someone like me, who would never get up before 10am on a Saturday was getting to the gym no later than 745am to make sure I could get my spot in that mornings class. I would even set my alarm at 5am to call in my childwatch reservation for the next day’s class. I could feel this healthy fit person inside me just screaming to get out. I wanted to keep up with the pros and have the body to match but food was my struggle. I wasn’t making the right choices, being seduced by french fries and chocolate cake my weight loss was minimal. I unhappily teetered between 250lbs and 265lbs for the next 6 months. My husband being military, it was once again time to pick up and move thousands of miles away from everything that was familiar and comfortable. I found myself totally discouraged when I was unable to find my new joy, Zumba near our new home. I simply gave up and quit.  I had allowed life’s challenges to defeat me once again.